I am not dead.

November 27, 2009 at 10:10 pm | Posted in New beginnings, Random Rants | 4 Comments
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Well, that was the blog speaking.

I looked at my blog archives and noticed that this blog has only 35 odd posts. And November has been especially deprived of blog posts so here is a quick and short blog post. Short because the last three blog posts averaged 1500 odd words each. 😐

So here is a quick review of what has happened in November:

  • Got three job offers and had to decline all of them for insanely stupid reasons. Well, not that I regret it but one of them was a very emotionally taxing decision. But its time to put those behind me(it is getting pretty crowded there though).
  • Diwali sucked, so did Durga puja so spent it on Twitter and didn’t regret it.
  • TCS told me sweetly that since I belong to the Non-computer science category, my joining will be somewhere in 2010. It was a #fml moment but I had expected something like it.
  • Acute joblessness was followed by a Mental Block towards the end of the month. I again had suicidal thoughts about Comicry, Twitter and all things online but thankfully sailed through without deleting any of them.
  • J’s father died. It was a loss indeed but again his chances of survival were slim. On a positive note, he died at home, away from white sheets, the smell of disinfectants and monitors and needles. His entire family was by his side, his grandchildren too. And he had that last cup of tea, something he always loved(and something that we had in common)
  • Earned 3.34$ in Google Adsense. Have promised to gift Mom a pair of slippers next year if I manage to make around 5$ by then.
  • Participated in Nanowrimo for the sake of it. Wrote 2500 odd words around which time the mental block began. The story lies there, orphaned, bereaved. In the meantime, I designed a cover for the novel(if it ever sees the light of day).
  • Read Chetan Bhagat’s 2 States to get some inspiration for Nanowrimo but this masterplan bombed bigtime. The one-night-stand with the novel was completely wasted. If the first three were remotely bearable if you looked at them as bollywood movies and not books – this one was like watching Hum Aapke Hain Kaun meets Ek Duje ke liye  remade by Ram Gopal Verma. Zero inspiration but will make for a good, cheap gift in case ‘3 idiots’ is a hit at the box office.
  • Finished reading ‘To kill a mocking bird’ finally and loved it. Will watch the movie now. Also bought Charlie Chaplin’s autobiography and The Silence of the Lambs. *next in line*
  • This is all I can remember.

In other unrelated news, a few good(read: readable) blog posts will be coming up on TGAT in the coming days(hopefully!). Moreover I realized that a ‘good’ blogger should post once in a while and that the 1000 words long post should be far and few, like important news on News channels and good movies by Yash Raj films. Lesson learnt.

Also, some of your comments are landing in the spam queue. I am sorry if one of yours went in there, will try to be more vigilant in the future.

thus spake Tantanoo.

A visit to the Hospital

November 1, 2009 at 1:28 pm | Posted in Bhery Phunny, Random Rants | 6 Comments
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This post has been updated, scroll to the end to read only the updates.

Scene 1:

You enter the hospital premises. It looks good, just like any other hospital. It is midsized, one of those eternally-in-recession buildings. You walk up to the reception and ask “Can you tell me where’s the ICU here?” The lady will give you the you-look-like-an-insurance-policy- agent look and tell you that its on the second floor.

You walk up the stairs – one floor – terrace. Terrace? You run back down. Ask a wardboy and he also tells you that the ICU is on the second floor. You again climb the stairs but as you turn, you can see the sky above you *what second floor?*

You notice people sleeping in the aisles. You wake them up and ask them about the ICU. And again you cringe at the words ‘Second Floor’.

To hell with it. You climb to the Second Floor(read: terrace) and you reach a place which looks like an earthquake relief camp.

To your left are incomplete pillars, rubble, bricks, plywood, clothes drying on wires, Tiffin boxes, random junk and benches.

In front of you is a pile of rubble which bears the marks of ‘a thousand spitting sons’. There is also a bottle of Glucose, some chairs and more junk.

To your right are few rooms. One is the general ward(male), another is the general ward(female) and the third is the ICU. *THE ICU*

(There is also a table in the ICU lobby on which a presswala is doing istri(ironing clothes) with a smoke gushing charcoal iron, but that is another story)*

Scene 2:

There is a speaker in the ICU lobby. It is used by the office to remind people that you haven’t paid the advance amount for the day. So far it is good, extremely annoying but good, but sample this:

Announcement: “Zeeshaan naam ka ek baccha kho gaya hai. Agar aap uske maa baap hai ya usse jaante hain toh reception par aa jaye’”


Scene 3:

J to receptionist: “Ma’am, we just got this blood requisition form but there should be a stamp on it, the blood bank *which incidentally is a fucking one hours worth of travelling away* refused to accept it”

Receptionist: Which ass gave you this form without the stamp?

J: “The Assholes who work in your ICU”

Receptionist: *Stamps the paper and returns it*

Scene 4:

Announcement: “Pravin zara ICU ke bahar aa jayein” *Pravin, please come to the ICU*

Five Pravin’s march up to the ICU. Four burqa clad women and J.

Scene 5:

I am waiting in the ICU lobby. I am reading a Jeffery Archer because that is the only book that I can read in such chaos. The guy in front of me thinks I am reading a James Hadley Chase you get at those cheesy bookstalls.

The aunty sitting next to me is anxious and sleepy. There is a notice on the door which says ‘Maintain Silence’.

Suddenly a mobile phone rings(read: Screams) – “Ho gaya hai tumko toh pyar sajna, laakh kar le tu inkaar sajna”!

Aunty gets up, takes the mobile out of her blouse(ancient indian practice) and looks at the number. Then she picks it up at her own leisure and walks out to finish the conversation, while others in the lobby snigger at her. No one complains(which includes me).


When we talk of a hospital we assume a few things. Well organized facilities, rules, regulations, visiting hours, educated nurses and wardboys and above all cleanliness.

One look at the facility and I thought that if one of the good hospitals in the city is in this state, one can imagine the condition of the lesser known/ unauthorized medical centres that abound this city.

There is a complete disregard for silence. People are accompanied by kids who run around, scream, fall, get injured and join the list of patients.

Every patient is accompanied by atleast 15 people of whom only 2 are family(or lets say interested family). Rest come to the hospital for marking attendance, gossiping, cribbing, discussing news and politics(Aadha Jaipuar jal gaya hai aag mein and like).

There is  a dustbin. For decoration. Because people(including a few I know) will spit on the rubble, in the corners and anywhere they can spot. But this isn’t it. The wardboys(who are as educated and qualified and well mannered as Ajmal Kasab in an indian prison) have a special corner for them where they’ll spit. Everything is arranged. Anything is possible.

There are NO facilities for family and friends to sit/stay. J slept on a piece of ply in 12 degrees temperature for two nights. Thank you very much.

The hospital staff understand that talking and joking at the top of their voices helps boost the morale of the patient so they’ll laugh, talk, abuse at near-ultrasonic frequencies. So much for the ‘Maintain silence’ notice.

My faith in Common sense just took a major dent today.


The hospital isn’t as bad as I made it sound. The doctors are responsible and not the wallet-hungry kind. The hospital is our only choice because it lets the doctor of our choice call the shots and thus saves our patient. But why build something and leave it in tatters? What can explain this complete disregard for basic(read: basic) behaviour, common sense and lack of discipline on both ends?

As for my complaints, I complained to J, he had his share of grudges too and will talk it out with the doctors. I did ask the wardboys to mind their voice. I did ask the guard to tell the lady to turn her mobile phone to silent.  But there is only so much you can do. Hence the rant.





Well, I went there again today. This time I managed to click a few pictures which would lend some credibility to the tale.

It was there that I heard about this:

Uncle was shifted from the ICU to the HDU for a short while. When our doctor arrived, the statistics on the monitor suddenly went berserk, not showing outputs for a few variables.

The doctor was in a shock that a heart attack has probably happened and they weren’t aware of it. For those two minutes J went blank.

Then an attendant called out – “Arrey sir, woh ek electrode loose ho gaya tha”.

*speechless again*

The doctor wiped the sweat from his forehead(he is one of the old ones, those who care about their patients) and shrugged it off as ‘human error – manaviya truti’.

And just to round things up – here is an additional photograph.

Yes, the kid is playing with a used syringe(without the needle though). I told his grandfather twice that please take it away from him, but who gives a fuck really?

*(On a promising note though, the presswala has been ousted from the ICU premises. Thank God for little mercies.)

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